If I had a "mantra" for motherhood, that would be mine.
I am a peacemaker mother and, as it turns out, that is a bad thing. I'm suppose to let my kids work out their differences so they learn "social skills" and to "compromise" and important "lessons."
But they argue all the time and it annoys me. (Yes, yes, it only annoys me because I LET it annoy me...ugh). So I intervene and try to work out a solution that will make everyone happy and (hopefully) quiet.
They argue over things. (I had it first! )
They argue over food. (That's my cookie, you already had two! )
They argue over places. (I called shotgun! )
Most of the time my efforts are for naught because no matter what solution I suggest one child will declare That's not fair!
Fairness. Is life ever fair? Too often goodness goes unrewarded and evil goes unpunished...And sometimes your brother eats the last cookie even though he has already had two.
Fairness, it seems, is a matter of perspective. The son who ate the last cookie thought it was fair for him to take the cookie because he got to it first. The son who complained had already ate a cookie, cleaned up the crumbs, and left the room. It looked like he was done eating cookies, but he was only taking a break and planned to come back and eat his second cookie later.
I can't change life to make it fair. And often I lack the wisdom to discern what fair even is. I like the second paragraph of the Serenity Prayer (though tacked on):
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
As it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
If I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
And supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
I like the thought "hardships as the pathway to peace." Yes, I expect peace to come easily. (Why can't we all just get along?)
Ok, I've got my "courage to change the things that should be changed." I'm going to bake another batch of cookies.
And, so help me, a certain son will get the last cookie.